Another day

Another day over with. Sometimes I feel like I'm just waiting for the days to pass. I'd love to be a few months down the road....I'd be closer to my goal as far as my weight goes, I'd be closer to going home for Christmas, maybe I'd have more of an idea of what I want or where I'm headed. I don't know. It's hard to enjoy the days lately. I just feel like I'm going through the motions for the most part.

I had a pretty bad day today. I worked until about 4:30. I woke up feeling ok, but on my way to work, I started to feel really nauseous. Then that subsided after 20 minutes or so, but then the light-headed/dizzy feeling from a week or so ago came back and has not yet gone away. Ugh. I was looking it up on Google. It's hard to figure out what it is exactly because my symptoms have been pretty vague. But I did read something about possibly meaning I have low levels of iron and also that taking a B complex pill might help. I actually have some B Complex that I was taking last time I was on a diet because someone told me B12 and B6 can help with your metabolism, and B Complex is also good for energy. I took it for a few days this week, but then forgot the last couple of days. I'm wondering if maybe that's why I started to feel better? I just took some and will continue to do so for the next week at least, and I'll see if that helps.

I didn't exercise because of how I felt. Food was tough because when you feel light-headed, you tend to feel like food might help. Or maybe that's just me - my instinct is to try food as a remedy for everything, I think! Anyway - I did make sure to have some protein and stuff when I got home from work, but it didn't seem to help at all. I guess I just wanted to eat as a source of comfort, since that's what I usually do. For breakfast before work I had an orange. I was going to try to eat more, but I didn't end up having time. Then after I started feeling nauseous, I thought I might need to put something more into my system. Unfortunately, I didn't have a lot of options since I was running short on time, so I ended up getting a small mocha from the coffee shop next to my work. I'm not sure that there was any reason to think that would help, but for some reason it felt like it would. I only drank half though and got it with nonfat milk, so it was about 100 calories. Not bad. When I got home from work, I had deli roast beef with a little bit of horseradish sauce, some cucumbers, and a cup of milk. For a snack I had a peach and raspberries and later some baby carrots. Then for dinner I had some more roast  beef with some cooked carrots.

I was still feeling like I wanted to eat more and I was really craving chocolate. I considered just trying to eat fruit or something instead, but that hadn't really been satisfying my need for the comfort food. I decided that if I am planning to stick to this long term and really improve my eating as opposed to just going hardcore on a diet and then rebelling from it and binging because I've deprived myself so much, it might be better to treat myself once in a while when I really want something. And plus, I still had a LOT of calories left for the day. So I ended up going to get some frozen yogurt. I figured yogurt was better than  lot of things, right? Ok, so I justified it a lot to myself. But I still think my reasons were somewhat valid. And I only ended up eating half of the yogurt I got because I promised myself I would stop when I felt satisfied. So I think I did pretty well, all things considered. I'm still under my calories for the day and I don't feel deprived. I'm going to chalk that up as a victory.

Anyway, I'm really hoping I feel better tomorrow. I seriously need to workout because I've slacked off the last couple of days. Even if I'm not 100%, I will definitely go walking or something. I also still need to go to the grocery store. For now, I'm off to bed!